Copy & Paste Bullet Points

Earlier this year, I sent the following to a loved one who was struggling.  I think it helped her.  I have zero energy/spoons today.  I feel extremely disoriented like I just woke up from having slept for a year and I have no idea what's going on.  I am getting dizzy spells along with growing pain.  So, I am not going to spend any further time out of bed.  This is copied and pasted from that email:

1.  There is no rule that says you must be ok all the time.  What you must be is true to yourself and caretaker for yourself.  The End.

2.  Every single feeling you have, love, rage, jealousy, anger, joy, all of them - are normal.  They are in us and part of us and we can learn about ourselves from each one.  None are abnormal or disposable or bad.  

  I call mine "The Mini-Marie Army".  I literally picture myself surrounded by a few dozen tiny clones of me, like 2 ft tall.  Each Mini holds a sign.  When her sign, her feeling comes up, she gets to use her voice.  Every single mini me is as important as every other.  No feeling or emotion should be squelched or denied or tell myself I shouldn't feel that way.  That dishonors my little army and the person God made me to be.  That feeling is real, valid, and she deserves her voice.  And, after I let her speak, the feeling flows away like water in a stream.  And in this image, this visual fantasy I draw support from, I also am never, ever alone.  I have all these dozens of versions of myself to give me strength.

Also, if I try only to let the OK mini-Marie speak (from #1) and none of the others, think of how much goes unsaid, unlearned, stopped up.  

3.  At the edge of the unknown, we have two choices.  Fear or curiosity.  Usually, we choose fear because its easy and we've chosen it for so long its habitual and we are comfortable in it.  But, if I imagine I am really at the edge, and I don't know what is in the next step, I wonder if there is gravity, I wonder if I could float or fly, I wonder how I will solve obstacles and cope with limitations.  Curiosity implies hope and life-giving energy.  Problem-solving.  Creativity.  ON the other hand if I choose to just predict my future, in spite of the next step being entirely UNKNOWN, and either back away or fall, expecting to do so (since I'm now some kind of psychic and I know whats gonna happen.).  

4.  It is super easy to go about our business and not ask for help.  Just the fact that its hard to do and people avoid it and it makes even the toughest of us uncomfortable PROVES that it takes incredible courage to do it.  You have within you the courage you need to do it.  Just let that little Mini-you speak.  

5.  I wonder what I look like in Christ's eyes.  He, above all, understands exactly what I suffer, exactly how I feel.  And I wonder if I am honoring Him by respecting myself and my needs.  Sure, life feels crappy some days.  Yes, it would be easier to wallow in self-pity.  But, he made me amazing.  I know that and it is up to me to be as close to that as I can even with my limits.  He made each person special.  Just some decide they want to take on the role of victim or helpless or whatever.  I know He can smile when He sees me because I continue to try, and when I need to, I sit down and grieve (Jesus wept), and then I do next what ever respects my body.