I have said before, in several places and many times that I don't have fear about my life. Well last week, my body very clearly demonstrated that I'm a liar. And I just saw a blurb on FB that sums it up, I think.
I'm afraid because I know I can't fight forever.
That's what having this life feels like. I will have to fight forever.
On a brighter note, I am doing well with my switch in sleeping position. Successfully on my back without changing all night for a week now. I have no idea how this is helping me, but I trust that it is. Just the amount of pain I'm in right now would suggest that NOTHING I'm doing is helping. lol So, its hard to discern what to continue to do and what to discard.
Migraines are under much better control. I have added an ever so slight amount of caffeine to my daily fluid intake throughout the day, and it does make a difference. I add 2 full glasses of ice water to one cup of brewed tea. Sometimes, I have half a coke zero diluted with a glass of ice water and lemon juice. Really trying to keep it at as low a level as I can. I want to not have to take my precious Zomig pill. I only get 9 for a month. I'm only "allowed" to have 9 instances where I suspect what I feel will turn into a migraine. So, trying to hoard pills is an obvious problem.
I finally found a great therapist! For me, the amount of good a great therapist does for me may exceed all the 4 meds I'm on put together. Except for my migraine abortive, of course. We only had one visit but, she already knows so much about me from how I handled that panic attack that I just intuit she and I will work well together. So glad I fired the other one when I did and that her name was passed on to me. It's ironic that she does not accept any private insurance, but yet she does take Medicare. It's also important for me that she used to be an ICU nurse in younger years. She knows about the body. She knows about medicine. She knows about fibromyalgia. She was so glad that I asked my doctor for Xanax and have it in my purse and that I now carry a paper bag in my purse too. She even told me that if I ever need to take the Xanax, to put it under my tongue and let it melt. That way is the fastest to get into my bloodstream and begins to work within a few minutes. Neither my doc nor my pharmacist told me that. It takes the whole team, and now my team feels like I've got a solid quarterback. I will see her weekly for a while. Of the many things she asked me, "are you happily married?" was the one that brought a huge grin to my face when I said yes, and she said, "you have no idea how seldom I hear that." Blessed. So blessed.
We are going to adopt another dog for our home. A smaller one. Found one on Petfinder and was approved for her, but at the adoption event in Dallas yesterday, she nipped at Oscar twice. But, we did find another. I've not let myself fall in love with her but, she is a doll-face and I will be disappointed if something happens and we don't get to have her. She's a year old Cairn terrier mix. Good with Oscar and with the foster mom's kitties. She's probably under 20 lbs. If she doesn't get to be with us, at least Tim is on board with me and how desperately I need extra company sometimes. So, another sweetie will be in our future, maybe sweet Carrie, maybe someone else.
You've no idea how exciting that is for me. I have few things in life that I really can legitimately look forward to. This is one.
Also, my trip to FL next month is one. I'm not a super involved aunt like I wanted to be to all of them when they were born, but I do the best I can.
I pray so hard for this country and the world at large. Frankly, and I will not say political things here because this is my personal space, this year makes me nervous for us all. Again, like the title says, some fear indeed.
Well, enough now. It is a sort of dreary Sunday. It stormed this morning a bit, and now is just cloudy, windy, damp out. The bottoms of my feet feel like they've maybe walked a marathon or something similar. A very long distance on a very hard surface. So, wheelie is in play bright and early to save the day. Maybe not the whole day, but at least to remove that particular discomfort from my basket.
Grateful today for my shelter, my access to fresh food and water. Grateful for my medicine and my doctors. Grateful for electricity and air conditioning. These foundation blessings make it so I can feel comfortable enough and think clearly enough to recognize the mega-long list of the rest of my blessings.
Have happy days!
Sunday, September 18, 2016
Thursday, September 15, 2016
Today's Plan
Well, I am home today, when I want to be somewhere else. It's disappointing, frustrating, hard to accept the reality of the situation, and saddening. So, I've gotta find a way to be ok with it. I have to. I want to be at the warm, indoor saltwater pool swimming around. Instead, I am going to walk the dog, then I'm going to make homemade toothpaste and homemade shampoo and conditioner. Never made any of those before. Found recipes to use from a site I like. Every time I begin to feel sorry for myself, I look around at my lovely home, observe my sweet dog, and feel like an a_____e for not being grateful enough. O and I are currently playing "throw the Kong again so the last treat bounces out of it 'cause I can't get the last one out". Its a game we can play when I sit here on my laptop. We use Temptations cat treats as the innards and the game is the MOST fun when there's only one left inside, apparently. It starts out loaded with about 15 or so.
I am so looking forward to seeing a new psychologist tomorrow, especially since she was recommended to me by others whose lives are similar to mine. I can really feel the deficit of mental health support since my move here a few months ago. The first doc I tried was a bust. In all things, all my life, I try not to set expectations too high so as not to be too disappointed when they're not met, but in this case, I need her to "get" me and I need it soon. So, hopes are high.
Whoop, our Kong game is over. :/
I'm retraining myself to sleep at night on my back without moving. I've done it 4 nights in a row now, but, I've needed to take my valium to do it. Hopefully, as it becomes more habitual for my body, and as I develop the muscle memory, I will wean down and then back off the valium for sleeping. I have done that before, a couple times. It feels incredibly unusual to wake up on my back staring at my ceiling. I've never slept that way my whole life. My new massage therapist was pointing out all the ways that my tense muscles were pulling my skeleton out of alignment, which only compounds pain. One leg was a couple inches longer than the other, one hip was jutted forward an inch or so from it's partner. One scapula sat at a normal angle, the other at about a 45 degree angle. A general mess. So, he suggested this change and I told him I'd try. I feel good that I haven't broken down so far and flipped. I am so used to resting on my belly that it almost doesn't feel restful to lie on my back. It feels foreign.
Well, I guess I will get up, walk him, and make my little recipes. Enough of sitting here pondering life as I know it. I am glad not to be out there in the city on the bus. And I have hope that I'll be guided to the right mental health practitioner soon. My Father knows what I need. He provides. Grateful for the quiet, peace of my home and my lovely companion animals. I do have a very rich life.
Have happy days!
I am so looking forward to seeing a new psychologist tomorrow, especially since she was recommended to me by others whose lives are similar to mine. I can really feel the deficit of mental health support since my move here a few months ago. The first doc I tried was a bust. In all things, all my life, I try not to set expectations too high so as not to be too disappointed when they're not met, but in this case, I need her to "get" me and I need it soon. So, hopes are high.
Whoop, our Kong game is over. :/
I'm retraining myself to sleep at night on my back without moving. I've done it 4 nights in a row now, but, I've needed to take my valium to do it. Hopefully, as it becomes more habitual for my body, and as I develop the muscle memory, I will wean down and then back off the valium for sleeping. I have done that before, a couple times. It feels incredibly unusual to wake up on my back staring at my ceiling. I've never slept that way my whole life. My new massage therapist was pointing out all the ways that my tense muscles were pulling my skeleton out of alignment, which only compounds pain. One leg was a couple inches longer than the other, one hip was jutted forward an inch or so from it's partner. One scapula sat at a normal angle, the other at about a 45 degree angle. A general mess. So, he suggested this change and I told him I'd try. I feel good that I haven't broken down so far and flipped. I am so used to resting on my belly that it almost doesn't feel restful to lie on my back. It feels foreign.
Well, I guess I will get up, walk him, and make my little recipes. Enough of sitting here pondering life as I know it. I am glad not to be out there in the city on the bus. And I have hope that I'll be guided to the right mental health practitioner soon. My Father knows what I need. He provides. Grateful for the quiet, peace of my home and my lovely companion animals. I do have a very rich life.
Have happy days!
Saturday, September 10, 2016
Especially Harrowing Day
I am going to type this in as I spoke it into my voice recorder. ~M
It's Friday morning at 2:23 and I'm awake because I did so much extra sleeping when I got home yesterday so I want to record the events of the day now that my migraine is finally gone and I can speak more easily. So yesterday was Thursday which means swimming day. The bus came for me at 8:15 am. I felt ok. I was out of my migraine medicine but I was not worried about that at all. That was a mistake. I rode the bus to the pool and I was the only rider so I was there by um, about 9:15 am. So I got in the pool with the 9 o'clock class and I did about half their class with them and um, I swam quite a bit in between classes. Um, I got out and I ate part of my muffin and drank a lot of water um, before my class started at 10:15, no 10:30. So I was in the pool for a long time and I did have a migraine by the time my class started. I was having to wear my sunglasses in the pool. When my class finished at 11:15, I couldn't stay in the pool anymore and get any more exercise. I had to get out and rest my head with my hat on. So, I ate my sandwich wrap, drank more water, ate the rest of my muffin. The ride was due to come at 12:15 so I knew that I just had to sit and wait in there for an hour. So, I did that and I watched some people in the pool and I listened to a book and tried to keep my face in the dark. Because my head was getting progressively much worse. Um and my body was starting to really follow it and I was with my cane and not my wheelchair. so at about 12:15 when I looked at the app on my phone again for the bus, it said it was coming at 12:45 now. So I decided to go up the stairs and go into the offices to see if I could rest in there , sit in there while I wait for the extra half hour. Well the extra half hour turned into an hour because the bus didn't come until 1:15 and I was curled up on the floor of the office on one of their yoga mats because I was debilitated from my head and the extra pain that was in my body. Anique looked out for me for when the bus arrived so I wouldn't miss it and um she helped me to get on it. Um, so I got on the bus 2 full hours late after I got out of the pool and then we rode around in Dallas for an hour in that bus with a full migraine and um the pain in my body escalating and escalating. Um finally at about 2:15 or 2:20, um we dropped off another person, and then picked up another person, and my pain in my body just exploded all of a sudden like a bomb and I was just in agony everywhere. Like my head was so bad that I couldn't really communicate or think of words to say and I'd begun pulling my hair. I was out of water by this time. Um I was sitting in the back of the bus which was a little mini van and began just sobbing, openly sobbing in the bus. There was one other man on the bus with me who was mentally handicapped sitting in front of me, and then the driver in front of him. The driver talking on the phone in a different language and I couldn't stop crying. And I was wiggling around in the seat because my body hurt so bad and I was so uncomfortable. I was so uncomfortable, it was like, I can't even describe it. It was like things were inside me, crawling around me trying to get out so I was like squirming all over the backseat and pulling my hair and sobbing. And I was afraid. I was in so much pain and I was in such a bad situation that I became afraid and I started to have a panic attack. I started to breathe too shallowly and then I started to get where I couldn't take a full breath, I couldn't breathe deeply because I had done too much shallow breathing and I couldn't get my lungs to open again. The bus driver was asking what was wrong, I just tried to say that I was in pain, he asked if we needed an ambulance or if I just needed to be home and I said home. I was still sobbing, I couldn't stop sobbing, still pulling my hair, still squirming around. We were far away from my house still. He was trying to get me home as fast as he could, I know, because he knew I was in trouble and at 2:45 we pulled up to the front of our house. I was still sobbing. I told him that I couldn't walk, I couldn't get out, that he had to go press the bell. And its just coincidence I think that Tim worked from home yesterday for the first time since he's had this job he was at home. So he brought my wheelchair out to me and I sort of flung myself into it. The bus driver carried my bags and my cane to the door. Tim pushed me and got me in the door. I told him I needed a paper bag, I was hyperventilating. He said he didn't know where they were, I told him where they were. I was pulling my hair, still sobbing. He brought me 2 valiums and some water. Got me into my room onto the futon, got the fan turned on, got me some valiums some water and paper bag, left me for a little while. It was least a half hour of breathing into that bag before I could really breathe normally and feel um calm again. My body was actually past the point of pain, it was entirely numb at this point. I couldn't even feel any pain in my body anymore, which is maybe only about the second time that has happened since I have had fibromyalgia. That the pain was so much that it was no longer registering, that it was just numbness everywhere. My head was a hot mess of explosion, like I would say that it was at a 9, only because I never use the top number of the scale, so I would say this was a 9 or a 9.5 migraine. I had no business being out in the sunshine, I had no business being out there without any water on a bus. None. But, that's where I found myself so. So um, I laid for a while and breathed into the bag drank all the water I had and I got myself into my wheelchair, then I yelled for Tim to come and help me because I had to pee. The wheelchair doesn't go into my bathroom. So, I had to cross my arms around his neck and hug him and he had to lift me and take me onto the toilet. We had to get my swimming suit off me together so that I could pee. He brought me one of my cold frogg towels from the refrigerator and then we had to get me back up off the toilet onto the wheelchair back into this room. He brought me another tall glass of iced water with a straw and um then just left me with my frogg towel and my water to try to pass out, which I did. I woke up about maybe 5:30 um, needed more water, needed the bathroom again, went to the kitchen and made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for some dinner. Asked Tim to please go to WalMart and pick up my migraine medicine and also my Amitryptaline. We agreed that I wouldn't go to the pool again without at least one migraine pill available and that I would also not go there without my wheelchair again. My head still was in very bad condition but the rest helped it so I could to form sentences and I was able to communicate. It wasn't split open anymore, it was just wounded. Um so I went back to my room and tried to rest more in the dark and the quiet. He did go get my migraine medicine for me so that I'd have it for today's bus ride. But, I knew that it was not gonna help yesterday's so I didn't bother taking one. I did find my old hydrocodone which I haven't taken since about March I haven't taken it. I took one and it wasn't very long before I could feel it working, passing me out. So I brushed my teeth and um took my nighttime medicines and came back and laid down more to try to pass out again. So now at 2 in the morning I can say my migraine is finally gone. I do have a dull pain in my head that feels like a bruise was left from the migraine. It feels like my head is actually bruised. My body is in better shape, not good shape but better shape than it was in because I've rested so much. 2 am and I'm actually starving and quite thirsty. Um. So I didn't record this story tonight for my blog for any pity from anybody. If anybody wants to feel any pity toward me, please don't, turn it into prayer for me. Because pity will not help me in my life, but prayer will. Those of you who have never found yourself in an incredibly vulneralbe and scary situation where you did not have a person who you could depend on with you and you were alone, you might not understand why the hyperventilation happened, why I got so scared. I wasn't even aware of the fact that I was fearful, it was just happening from within me. I knew that I was in trouble when I started to pull my own hair because that's a behavior I've never done before. And so I knew from that behavior, it scared me, I knew that I was in a new and a very very bad situation. And that's when the hyperventilation began. I was able to keep that under control. I was able to find deep breath while I was still on the bus for a little while. I calmed myself down a couple of times but the sobbing just kept returning. By the time we got to the sidewalk in front of the house going into the house my lungs were on fire burning, trying to get breath in them. Which is quite frightening if you've never had that experience or lived through that. Um, it feels quite serious, it feels quite frightening. So even though people, doctors say that fibromyalgia is not a life-threatening thing, I really did think that I might die on the bus yesterday. I really did think that there were probably not that many ways I was gonna survive that. I think that's where the tears came from. So, I'll be curious to see how strong and how courageous I'll be when the bus pulls up at the house this morning to take me to my doctor. Whether or not I'll be afraid to get on it, whether or not, how I will feel. Because as of right now, I have to tell you I'm not looking forward to it. I look to it with dread, so, I will have to do a lot of praying and a lot of pep talk stuff to be able to get myself to my doctor this morning. And I need to go, because I need a muscle relaxer because my back is in trouble. I've got a massage scheduled on Saturday also, so I've gotta ride the bus two more days in a row, tomorrow and the following day. And it was a bad experience today. It was a bad experience. They were 2 hours late, and then I rode around in the bus for an hour before I started to have panic. It was at least another half an hour that I was sobbing and in panic mode so I'm not sure how the experience could have been worse than it was because I was in full on panic mode, sobbing openly, pulling my hair, on the bus. So it will be interesting to see how I can talk myself and pray myself into getting on the bus again today alone. I do have migraine medicine I can take with me, I do anticipate that my head will feel like a bruise for quite some days now after this. So, my gratitude for this entry will be that I was able to stay under control and not go into full hyperventilation while I was alone in the world. I was able to still keep enough oxygen and breath that I could tell the driver what I needed, tell my husband what I needed. I needed a paper bag. I needed my cold towel. I needed water, ice water. I had to be able to tell them that because I couldn't get those things on my own. So I have gratitude that I had enough left in me to communicate. Goodnight.
It's Friday morning at 2:23 and I'm awake because I did so much extra sleeping when I got home yesterday so I want to record the events of the day now that my migraine is finally gone and I can speak more easily. So yesterday was Thursday which means swimming day. The bus came for me at 8:15 am. I felt ok. I was out of my migraine medicine but I was not worried about that at all. That was a mistake. I rode the bus to the pool and I was the only rider so I was there by um, about 9:15 am. So I got in the pool with the 9 o'clock class and I did about half their class with them and um, I swam quite a bit in between classes. Um, I got out and I ate part of my muffin and drank a lot of water um, before my class started at 10:15, no 10:30. So I was in the pool for a long time and I did have a migraine by the time my class started. I was having to wear my sunglasses in the pool. When my class finished at 11:15, I couldn't stay in the pool anymore and get any more exercise. I had to get out and rest my head with my hat on. So, I ate my sandwich wrap, drank more water, ate the rest of my muffin. The ride was due to come at 12:15 so I knew that I just had to sit and wait in there for an hour. So, I did that and I watched some people in the pool and I listened to a book and tried to keep my face in the dark. Because my head was getting progressively much worse. Um and my body was starting to really follow it and I was with my cane and not my wheelchair. so at about 12:15 when I looked at the app on my phone again for the bus, it said it was coming at 12:45 now. So I decided to go up the stairs and go into the offices to see if I could rest in there , sit in there while I wait for the extra half hour. Well the extra half hour turned into an hour because the bus didn't come until 1:15 and I was curled up on the floor of the office on one of their yoga mats because I was debilitated from my head and the extra pain that was in my body. Anique looked out for me for when the bus arrived so I wouldn't miss it and um she helped me to get on it. Um, so I got on the bus 2 full hours late after I got out of the pool and then we rode around in Dallas for an hour in that bus with a full migraine and um the pain in my body escalating and escalating. Um finally at about 2:15 or 2:20, um we dropped off another person, and then picked up another person, and my pain in my body just exploded all of a sudden like a bomb and I was just in agony everywhere. Like my head was so bad that I couldn't really communicate or think of words to say and I'd begun pulling my hair. I was out of water by this time. Um I was sitting in the back of the bus which was a little mini van and began just sobbing, openly sobbing in the bus. There was one other man on the bus with me who was mentally handicapped sitting in front of me, and then the driver in front of him. The driver talking on the phone in a different language and I couldn't stop crying. And I was wiggling around in the seat because my body hurt so bad and I was so uncomfortable. I was so uncomfortable, it was like, I can't even describe it. It was like things were inside me, crawling around me trying to get out so I was like squirming all over the backseat and pulling my hair and sobbing. And I was afraid. I was in so much pain and I was in such a bad situation that I became afraid and I started to have a panic attack. I started to breathe too shallowly and then I started to get where I couldn't take a full breath, I couldn't breathe deeply because I had done too much shallow breathing and I couldn't get my lungs to open again. The bus driver was asking what was wrong, I just tried to say that I was in pain, he asked if we needed an ambulance or if I just needed to be home and I said home. I was still sobbing, I couldn't stop sobbing, still pulling my hair, still squirming around. We were far away from my house still. He was trying to get me home as fast as he could, I know, because he knew I was in trouble and at 2:45 we pulled up to the front of our house. I was still sobbing. I told him that I couldn't walk, I couldn't get out, that he had to go press the bell. And its just coincidence I think that Tim worked from home yesterday for the first time since he's had this job he was at home. So he brought my wheelchair out to me and I sort of flung myself into it. The bus driver carried my bags and my cane to the door. Tim pushed me and got me in the door. I told him I needed a paper bag, I was hyperventilating. He said he didn't know where they were, I told him where they were. I was pulling my hair, still sobbing. He brought me 2 valiums and some water. Got me into my room onto the futon, got the fan turned on, got me some valiums some water and paper bag, left me for a little while. It was least a half hour of breathing into that bag before I could really breathe normally and feel um calm again. My body was actually past the point of pain, it was entirely numb at this point. I couldn't even feel any pain in my body anymore, which is maybe only about the second time that has happened since I have had fibromyalgia. That the pain was so much that it was no longer registering, that it was just numbness everywhere. My head was a hot mess of explosion, like I would say that it was at a 9, only because I never use the top number of the scale, so I would say this was a 9 or a 9.5 migraine. I had no business being out in the sunshine, I had no business being out there without any water on a bus. None. But, that's where I found myself so. So um, I laid for a while and breathed into the bag drank all the water I had and I got myself into my wheelchair, then I yelled for Tim to come and help me because I had to pee. The wheelchair doesn't go into my bathroom. So, I had to cross my arms around his neck and hug him and he had to lift me and take me onto the toilet. We had to get my swimming suit off me together so that I could pee. He brought me one of my cold frogg towels from the refrigerator and then we had to get me back up off the toilet onto the wheelchair back into this room. He brought me another tall glass of iced water with a straw and um then just left me with my frogg towel and my water to try to pass out, which I did. I woke up about maybe 5:30 um, needed more water, needed the bathroom again, went to the kitchen and made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for some dinner. Asked Tim to please go to WalMart and pick up my migraine medicine and also my Amitryptaline. We agreed that I wouldn't go to the pool again without at least one migraine pill available and that I would also not go there without my wheelchair again. My head still was in very bad condition but the rest helped it so I could to form sentences and I was able to communicate. It wasn't split open anymore, it was just wounded. Um so I went back to my room and tried to rest more in the dark and the quiet. He did go get my migraine medicine for me so that I'd have it for today's bus ride. But, I knew that it was not gonna help yesterday's so I didn't bother taking one. I did find my old hydrocodone which I haven't taken since about March I haven't taken it. I took one and it wasn't very long before I could feel it working, passing me out. So I brushed my teeth and um took my nighttime medicines and came back and laid down more to try to pass out again. So now at 2 in the morning I can say my migraine is finally gone. I do have a dull pain in my head that feels like a bruise was left from the migraine. It feels like my head is actually bruised. My body is in better shape, not good shape but better shape than it was in because I've rested so much. 2 am and I'm actually starving and quite thirsty. Um. So I didn't record this story tonight for my blog for any pity from anybody. If anybody wants to feel any pity toward me, please don't, turn it into prayer for me. Because pity will not help me in my life, but prayer will. Those of you who have never found yourself in an incredibly vulneralbe and scary situation where you did not have a person who you could depend on with you and you were alone, you might not understand why the hyperventilation happened, why I got so scared. I wasn't even aware of the fact that I was fearful, it was just happening from within me. I knew that I was in trouble when I started to pull my own hair because that's a behavior I've never done before. And so I knew from that behavior, it scared me, I knew that I was in a new and a very very bad situation. And that's when the hyperventilation began. I was able to keep that under control. I was able to find deep breath while I was still on the bus for a little while. I calmed myself down a couple of times but the sobbing just kept returning. By the time we got to the sidewalk in front of the house going into the house my lungs were on fire burning, trying to get breath in them. Which is quite frightening if you've never had that experience or lived through that. Um, it feels quite serious, it feels quite frightening. So even though people, doctors say that fibromyalgia is not a life-threatening thing, I really did think that I might die on the bus yesterday. I really did think that there were probably not that many ways I was gonna survive that. I think that's where the tears came from. So, I'll be curious to see how strong and how courageous I'll be when the bus pulls up at the house this morning to take me to my doctor. Whether or not I'll be afraid to get on it, whether or not, how I will feel. Because as of right now, I have to tell you I'm not looking forward to it. I look to it with dread, so, I will have to do a lot of praying and a lot of pep talk stuff to be able to get myself to my doctor this morning. And I need to go, because I need a muscle relaxer because my back is in trouble. I've got a massage scheduled on Saturday also, so I've gotta ride the bus two more days in a row, tomorrow and the following day. And it was a bad experience today. It was a bad experience. They were 2 hours late, and then I rode around in the bus for an hour before I started to have panic. It was at least another half an hour that I was sobbing and in panic mode so I'm not sure how the experience could have been worse than it was because I was in full on panic mode, sobbing openly, pulling my hair, on the bus. So it will be interesting to see how I can talk myself and pray myself into getting on the bus again today alone. I do have migraine medicine I can take with me, I do anticipate that my head will feel like a bruise for quite some days now after this. So, my gratitude for this entry will be that I was able to stay under control and not go into full hyperventilation while I was alone in the world. I was able to still keep enough oxygen and breath that I could tell the driver what I needed, tell my husband what I needed. I needed a paper bag. I needed my cold towel. I needed water, ice water. I had to be able to tell them that because I couldn't get those things on my own. So I have gratitude that I had enough left in me to communicate. Goodnight.
Tuesday, September 6, 2016
Back/shoulder/neck
Muscle spasm. That is all I have to say. Please google it if you aren't aware of how this can make you feel.
Gratitude that its only in this one area of my body. More widespread might kill me.
Gratitude that its only in this one area of my body. More widespread might kill me.
Recipes in My Life (not for eating)
I save us so much money by doing a few things that are truly easy, if not I'd likely not embrace them so well, and they are so good for us. I eliminate chemicals that I don't want around by making stuff out of natural elements. Thought I'd compile a list of what I use on a daily basis so y'all can see how easy it is to stop paying $13.00 for detergent and 4.00 for deodorant, etc. I'm not hardcore at this DIY stuff-making. I still buy shampoo and conditioner, but it's on the horizon to get changed next. I still use toothpaste and mouthwash. Also I still use brand toilet bowl cleaner and dishwasher gel (I did try a few DIY dishwasher soap recipes, and was not satisfied with the results so, for now it's still Cascade). Most all the rest, I make. And when you make the stuff, you can customize the stuff. Lovely. These specific recipes are the ones I use in my home and life all the time. If I use hair spray, I use this. It's more like scrunch spray than finishing spray. I only wash myself with this body wash. Only this deodorant, and I don't refrigerate mine. I only do my dishes with this. I only scrub my bathtub with this. So, they work. And I think they work well. The one caveat I will add is that the laundry soap doesn't help things stay white. So, if you are a white whites purist, you'll want to beware. Whites in this house are dull. They aren't a priority for me. They are clean, that is all we need. Enjoy.
PS: I did not author any of these. They are all found online and many folks use them. Again, not my creation.
PS: I did not author any of these. They are all found online and many folks use them. Again, not my creation.
Hair Spray
Ingredients
· 1 cup of
hot water (not boiling)- Can also use strong Chamomile Tea as the base if you
want to lighten hair or black tea as the base if you want to darken hair, but
you will need to keep in the fridge.
· 2
tablespoons Epsom salts (or more for extra texture)
· 1/2 tsp
Himalayan or Sea Salt (optional but adds stiffness)
· 1
teaspoon aloe vera gel
· 1/2 tsp
conditioner (optional- don’t use if you have fine/oily hair)
· Optional:
a few drops of essential oils or a spritz of your favorite perfume for scent-
Lavender and citrus are great options
· Optional:
1 teaspoon lemon juice and 1 teaspoon vodka or alcohol- if you want to lighten
hair (the lemon juice lightens and the alcohol preserves)
Hair
Spray Instructions
1. Get a
spray bottle that holds at least 10 ounces. I used a glass bottle made from an
old apple cider vinegar bottle and a regular spray top. I also tripled the
recipe to accommodate the size of my bottle.
2. Put the
hot water (or tea) in the spray bottle and add the Epsom salts, sea salt
(optional), aloe vera, conditioner, scent (optional) and lemon juice/vodka (if
using).
3. Put the
cap on the bottle and shake for 1-2 minutes or until Epsom salts and sea salt
are dissolved. Store in the fridge if using lemon juice or tea base, or at room
temperature if you aren’t. Will last 3-4 months or longer.
Herbal Bedtime Tea
Ingredients
*Purchase organically-grown or wildcrafted herbs whenever possible. Parts are measured by volume not weight.
-3 parts chamomile flowers
-2 parts lemon balm
-1 part catnip
-1 part oatstraw
-1 part passionflower
-1/4 part hop flowers
-1/4 part valerian root
*Purchase organically-grown or wildcrafted herbs whenever possible. Parts are measured by volume not weight.
-3 parts chamomile flowers
-2 parts lemon balm
-1 part catnip
-1 part oatstraw
-1 part passionflower
-1/4 part hop flowers
-1/4 part valerian root
Method
1. Measure the parts of each of the
herbs listed and mix in a large bowl until well combined.
2. Grab your tea accessories, tea infusers,
and/or tea pots…and brew a
cup! (Note: I get all of my loose leaf tea-making supplies online
from Mountain Rose Herbs.)
3. This herbal tea blend will keep
stored in a cool, dark place for approximately 6 months. (Note: I like
to store all of my teas in glass jars with tight-fitting
lids.)
4. This tea is mild enough to use
nightly. Take a cup 30 minutes before bed.
Homemade Muscle Rub Recipe
The
blends below start at a 5% dilution, which combined with the cayenne-infused
oil should be sufficient for most situations. However, in some cases you may
find that more is needed to relax and soothe. A 10-20% dilution is considered
appropriate for very sore muscles if used only on an occasional basis. To
increase the dilution ratio to 10%, simply double the number of drops. To
increase it to 15%, triple the number of drops. To increase it to 20%,
quadruple the number of drops.
INGREDIENTS
· 4 fluid
ounces (1/2 cup) melted coconut oil – this will yields
about 2 fluid ounces of infused oil (where to buy coconut oil)
· 100 drops
peppermint essential oil or eucalyptus globulus – 50 drops of wintergreen
essential oil can be used in place of peppermint or eucalyptus, but please read
the cautions below before including it (where to buy peppermint essential oil, where to buy eucalyptus essential oil, where to buy wintergreen essential oil)
*Note
About Wintergreen Essential Oil: This oil should be avoided by
pregnant and breastfeeding mamas, children, anyone on anticoagulant medication,
anyone who has recently undergone surgery or will soon undergo surgery,
individuals with hemophilia or other bleeding disorders, and anyone who has a
salicylate sensitivity (this often applies to individuals with ADD/ADHD).
(Source: Essential Oil Safety)Individuals
with the MTHFR mutation may also have a
problem with wintergreen due to it’s high salicylate content. If this applies
to you, replace the wintergreen with 50 more drops of peppermint or eucalyptus
globulus essential oil.
EQUIPMENT
· double
boiler (or a pot that fits inside another pot)
INSTRUCTIONS
1. Place coconut oil and cayenne in
a double boiler and gently warm the oil. Be careful not to let it get hot
because the smell of cayenne will fill the room and make you cough. (Not that I
would know that from experience – ahem).
2. Once the oil is slightly warm
give it a stir and then turn off the stove. Allow it to sit for half an
hour and then repeat the process.At this point you can move on to step 3, or
you can warm it again and allow to infuse 1-2 more times for a stronger oil. Overall
this process should take 1-2 hours, depending on how many times you reheat the
oil to intensify the infusion.
3. Using a cheesecloth or old
t-shirt, strain the mixture mixture over a measuring cup. After straining
out the spices, add enough coconut oil so that the final amount is 1/4 cup.
4. Melt beeswax and shea butter in a
double boiler and add to the coconut oil. Stir in essential oils and allow to
cool completely.
5. Store in an airtight jar – Amber
or cobalt are best but a clear jar is fine if kept out of direct sunlight
(which promotes oxidation).
Storage
and Shelf Life
I
recommend storing this rub in the fridge to preserve shelf-life, which should
be around 6-12 months.
Mind-Clearing Mist
Ingredients
4 ounces water
10 drops peppermint essential oil
20 drops sweet orange essential oil
4 drops patchouli essential oil
10 drops peppermint essential oil
20 drops sweet orange essential oil
4 drops patchouli essential oil
Directions
1. In a
spray-mist bottle, combine all ingredients. Shake vigorously.
2. To
use, apply a light misting to face, neck and surrounding airspace.
Homemade Body Wash Recipe
Ingredients
Directions
Measure
out all ingredients and combine in a bottle with a squirt top, shaking to mix.
Shake gently before each use. To use, squirt onto a washcloth, bath pouf, or
directly onto body.
Since
this recipe doesn’t contain water, it has a long shelf life.
Fabric Softener
Ingredients
- 3 c
White Vinegar
- 1/4
c Rubbing Alcohol (or vodka)
- 20
drops of Essential Oil (such as Tea Tree, Purification, or Thieves)- I recommend this brand
This is
easy! Simply put the ingredients into a glass jar, shake it up and you're ready
to go! Just add ½-¾ cup to your fabric softener dispenser in you washing
machine the next time you do a load.
That's so easy right?
That's so easy right?
Homemade Laundry Detergent
1 bar, Dr. Bronner's Castille Soap -OR- 1 cup liquid Dr. Bronner's Castille Soap* (from Whole Foods)
1/2 cup washing soda (sold at Meijer's)
1/2 cup borax (sold at Target)
water
5 gallon bucket with lid (sold at Home Depot)
Using a food processor with a grater attachment, or an old-fashioned regular grater, grate the Castille bar soap, or simply use the liquid Castille.
Heat 6 cups of water until very hot, but not boiling. Pour the water into the 5 gallon bucket, and add the Castille soap. Stir until dissolved.
Add washing soda and borax, and stir until dissolved.
(for this next step, you really want to make sure that the bucket is in a place where you will be storing it, so you won't have to carry it. Once the bucket is full, it is heavy!)
Fill the bucket within a few inches of the top, and stir well. Let stand overnight.
In the morning, stir again. There will be a gelatinous topping, so you want to stir the detergent, until it is the consistency of egg-drop soup.
You are now ready to use the detergent. I used a ladle and a funnel, and re-used several plastic juice and cider containers, and poured the detergent into several smaller containers, and stored the rest of the detergent in the bucket.
TO USE: Simply add 1/2 cup of the laundry detergent, while the water is filling the basin, so it mixes with the water.
*Dr. Bronner's comes in all sorts of nice scents, I chose a citrus scent, which works great. However, since the scent comes from essential oils instead of chemicals, it is much more subtle than traditional detergent. If you want stronger scents, add essential oils. But honestly, I love the way clothes just smell, well, clean.
1 bar, Dr. Bronner's Castille Soap -OR- 1 cup liquid Dr. Bronner's Castille Soap* (from Whole Foods)
1/2 cup washing soda (sold at Meijer's)
1/2 cup borax (sold at Target)
water
5 gallon bucket with lid (sold at Home Depot)
Using a food processor with a grater attachment, or an old-fashioned regular grater, grate the Castille bar soap, or simply use the liquid Castille.
Heat 6 cups of water until very hot, but not boiling. Pour the water into the 5 gallon bucket, and add the Castille soap. Stir until dissolved.
Add washing soda and borax, and stir until dissolved.
(for this next step, you really want to make sure that the bucket is in a place where you will be storing it, so you won't have to carry it. Once the bucket is full, it is heavy!)
Fill the bucket within a few inches of the top, and stir well. Let stand overnight.
In the morning, stir again. There will be a gelatinous topping, so you want to stir the detergent, until it is the consistency of egg-drop soup.
You are now ready to use the detergent. I used a ladle and a funnel, and re-used several plastic juice and cider containers, and poured the detergent into several smaller containers, and stored the rest of the detergent in the bucket.
TO USE: Simply add 1/2 cup of the laundry detergent, while the water is filling the basin, so it mixes with the water.
*Dr. Bronner's comes in all sorts of nice scents, I chose a citrus scent, which works great. However, since the scent comes from essential oils instead of chemicals, it is much more subtle than traditional detergent. If you want stronger scents, add essential oils. But honestly, I love the way clothes just smell, well, clean.
Easy DIY Dish Soap
Author: Kristin
Marr
Ingredients
·
1¼ cups water
·
15-20 drops each: peppermint essential oil (where to buy) and tea tree essential
oil (where to buy)
Optional:
·
½ TB nourishing oil (jojoba, almond, olive oil,
etc.)--If you'll be using this soap with bare hands.
Instructions
1.
In a saucepan, heat the the water just until it
reaches a boiling point. Turn off the heat and add the washing soda and borax,
stirring to dissolve. Let the mixture cool for 3-5 minutes, just until warm,
but no longer hot.
2.
Add the Sal Suds and and essential oils to the
water mixture. Vigorously whisk the ingredients together.
3.
Use a funnel to pour the dish soap into a soap
dispenser (I found one at IKEA). The soap may separate after sitting for 24
hours. If this happens, vigorously shake the soap bottle until the ingredients
are combined.
Deodorant
Ingredients
1/2 cup coconut oil
1/4 cup cornstarch (or arrowroot powder for sensitive skin)
1/4 cup baking soda
1/8 -1/4 teaspoon essential oil (We like lavender and lemongrass, but feel free to choose your favorite)
1/4 cup cornstarch (or arrowroot powder for sensitive skin)
1/4 cup baking soda
1/8 -1/4 teaspoon essential oil (We like lavender and lemongrass, but feel free to choose your favorite)
*Recipe slightly adapted from gnowfglins.com
Instructions
1. If the coconut oil is in a solid state, put some
in a microwave-safe container and pop it in the microwave for 10-second
intervals (until it melts fully).
2. Mix in essential oil.
3. Add cornstarch and baking soda and mix until smooth.
4. Transfer to a jar and apply with your hands or an empty deodorant tube for mess free application.
2. Mix in essential oil.
3. Add cornstarch and baking soda and mix until smooth.
4. Transfer to a jar and apply with your hands or an empty deodorant tube for mess free application.
Note: It may be best to refrigerate your deodorant
since coconut oil has a low melting point.
Disinfectant
makes 1 medium bottle
Safe for use on granite, great for killing germs anywhere.
3 tbsp Castile soap
30 drops essential oil
Enough water to fill bottle
Safe for use on granite, great for killing germs anywhere.
3 tbsp Castile soap
30 drops essential oil
Enough water to fill bottle
Shower spray
makes 1 bottle
Lightly mist walls and tub after you shower—no more evil soap scum!
1 cup water
1 cup vinegar*
2 tbsp Castile soap*
10 drops essential oil
Lightly mist walls and tub after you shower—no more evil soap scum!
1 cup water
1 cup vinegar*
2 tbsp Castile soap*
10 drops essential oil
Soft scrub
makes 2 squeeze bottles (mix in individual
bottles!)
Scrub into tubs, sinks, and toilets—let sit, then
rinse.
1/2 cup baking soda per bottle (1 cup total)
1/2 cup Borax per bottle (1 cup total)
1/2 cup Castile soap per bottle (1 cup total)
15 drops essential oil per bottle (30 total)
Splash or two of water per bottle (get it to the consistency you want)
1/2 cup baking soda per bottle (1 cup total)
1/2 cup Borax per bottle (1 cup total)
1/2 cup Castile soap per bottle (1 cup total)
15 drops essential oil per bottle (30 total)
Splash or two of water per bottle (get it to the consistency you want)
All-purpose cleaner
makes 2
medium bottles
Use on all surfaces except maybe granite, wood furniture, and food areas like cutting boards.
2 cups hot water
2 tbsp Borax (dissolve)
1/4 cup vinegar*
1/2 cup Castile soap*
40 drops essential oil
Use on all surfaces except maybe granite, wood furniture, and food areas like cutting boards.
2 cups hot water
2 tbsp Borax (dissolve)
1/4 cup vinegar*
1/2 cup Castile soap*
40 drops essential oil
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