Decisions, decisions

January 11, 2015

Some of you who know me well, will agree that I am quite decisive.  I rarely debate something in my head or with another person once I already have a plan of action I want to take.  Now, if I am without any plan, I will seek advice.  But, this decisiveness and call to immediate action has been with me for as long as I know.  Also, I rarely second guess myself.  If things went wrong, well, they went wrong and if I'm to blame then I apologize and try to correct what I can correct and move back into the present moment.

Recently, the decisiveness went wrong.  On Monday, I had such a completely clueless day that it frightened me.  I became convinced that I did not want to live in such a fog because I might indeed accidentally hurt myself, or burn my house down, or whatever.  In an effort at action in the face of "battle" I decided abruptly to stop taking everything I take which is not prescribed to me by my doctors.  That amounts to an entire hand full of vitamins and supplements.  I took only my meds.  Well, the fog has cleared in my head.  Although, I have no way to know if that is related to the fact.....

had to stop and am picking up later....

if it is related to the extra chemicals in the supplements being gone or if the extraneous stimulating sounds  are the key but, probably it is come combo of the two.  I am having many more clear headed days now than I had when I first began this entry.

Grateful for courage to decide.  And the ability to take it on the chin when the decision goes badly.