Brain damage

Well, I just read an article with so much validated research that I know it is proven.  So, there is no question of its truth.  Here is the point.  Fibromyalgia causes brain damage in people who have it.

               Researchers found that in people with chronic pain, a front region of the cortex associated with emotion fails to deactivate when it should. It's stuck on full throttle, wearing out neurons and altering their connections.

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/02/080205171755.htm

Now, that is quite a depressing thing to read.  How can it not be?  They've proven that as much as it sucks living through the pain, doing so actually damages my brain.  Hmmmm you say.  Why bother to keep showing up?  I know that sounds drastic, and I am by no means near that kind of thinking but, come on, it is high time that the world stop judging or assessing "what we are going through" because frankly, they are going to come up short every time.  For one thing, every time, my brain will be damaged a bit more.  Also, how could anyone feel what's inside the very private vessel that is me?  Impossible.    

Think about that one line for just a moment.  "Stuck on full throttle."  So the first thing that comes to my mind is a car.  A car stuck on full throttle is a disaster waiting to happen.  What else has throttles, maybe an elevator?  Well, the floors are going to stop up there somewhere or down there somewhere.  How about even my electric toothbrush?  It will burn out and I'm imagining smoke will be involved if it stayed stuck on full force.  Here is the point - anything stuck on full throttle will end abruptly, permanently and probably very messily.  I cannot think of a single exception.  Nothing, not any man made device or machine, nor any animal I know of can sustain being "stuck on full throttle".  It hands my mortality to me on a plate.  Huge questions arise about how damaged my brain will be when I'm 55 or 65.  After all, medicine cannot treat the root causes yet at all.  They are just now figuring out how it effects us.  It is quite a thing to read about a disease you live with.

So, how to bring this knowledge into my soul cohesively?  How to embrace the damage to my brain which is happening every single second of my life.  There is an answer.  Just give it to Him.  There is nothing else I can possibly do.  If I am to enjoy any of the life I'm given by Christ's sacrifice, I have to also let Him help me carry this burden.  To try to carry it alone, that would be suicide.  And, for those of you who know me very well, you know I do not use that word lightly.  I would never.  

Today I pray for folks with pain like mine who are not close to the Lord.  I pray that they can find their way to Him, that they are guided in His direction and develop a "besties" relationship with Him.  Without Him, how could I actually face each day?  Really?  I mean, full throttle always?  Come on.

Thankful that I was raised in deep faith which comforts and nourishes me during all the moments of my life.  Even, and especially during the brain damaging ones.  

Have happy, happy days.